


Cryptid Hunting

by heterophobictjkippen



Category: Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson
Genre: Awkward Dates, Crack Treated Seriously, Cryptids, Fluff, Fluff and Crack, Gay, Guns, M/M, Short One Shot, White boys being white boys, the gun is jared's parents', this is not funny. at all
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-19
Updated: 2018-05-19
Packaged: 2019-05-09 02:14:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 574
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14707176
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heterophobictjkippen/pseuds/heterophobictjkippen
Summary: Jared has a history of bad places he takes Evan on dates.This one is no exception.





	Cryptid Hunting

“Hey, Evan! I have a good date idea!” Jared called to his boyfriend, beaconing him over.

Evan groaned, following him and giving him a concerned look. “Please don't tell me you're taking me to Ikea again. That was absolutely awful.”

“That was fun though!” He protested.

“You got kicked out for hiding in the washing machines.” Evan reminded him, raising a brow.

The shorter boy narrowed his eyes and groaned a bit. That was a fun date, but this one would be better. “You like being outside, right?” Jared asked, to which Evan nodded. “We're gonna go up into the mountains. There was a Bigfoot sighting there a few weeks ago.” 

The moment those words left Jared’s mouth, Evan found himself in complete shock. “Are you taking me Bigfoot hunting? Why can't we just go to movies like normal couples?” He whined and crossed his arms.

“When have we ever gone on a normal date?”

Jared had a fair point.

“Come on, you’ll have fun. I've got stuff in my car already.” He pleaded, giving Evan his infamous puppy eyes.

“Fine.” He gave in and sighed. Fuck Jared and his stupid cuteness.

Jared's unadulterated cuteness was what got Evan into his car, and what got them up in the mountains, and what got them searching around the large area with a flashlight.

“Jared, this is stupid.” Evan hissed, shining the flashlight where his boyfriend pointed.

“Shush!” Jared whispered, nudging Evan hard. “You're going to scare him!”

“Your loud breathing is going to scare him!”

A bush rustled, and Evan jumped behind Jared, using him as a human shield. Jared pulled something out of his jacket and pointed it at the bush.

“Is that a gun?!” Evan shrieked, to which Jared shushed him again.

“I brought it for protection,” he explained quietly. “And for the off chance we find Bigfoot.”

Evan gave him a horrified look and nearly lost it. “Are you telling me that you were planning on killing Bigfoot??” His screaming had already scared the thing in the bush away. “He's a cryptid! You can't kill cryptids!” He turned off the flashlight and sighed.

“Jare, I wanna go home. This date sucks.” 

Jared put the gun back in his jacket and frowned, dropping his head in shame. “I'm sorry, Ev. I thought it'd be fun.” 

“Well, it wasn't.” He huffed, crossing his arms, starting to head back to Jared's car. “I'm banning you from choosing places.” He opened the door to the driver's side and held his hand out. “I'm driving home.” He decided firmly.

The other boy begrudgingly agreed, and tossed the keys to Evan, sitting in the passenger's seat. They put on their seatbelts, and Evan began driving out of the woods.

“I didn't mean to make you feel bad,” Evan started, glancing over to his distraught boyfriend. “It's just, we always go on outrageous dates. I wanna go somewhere where we can have fun and enjoy ourselves.”

“What do you say we go home and watch a movie? There's a couple of pints of Ben and Jerry's waiting for us back at my place.” He offered, and smiled as Jared perked up.

“I'd like that.” He agreed. “Can I have a kiss?”

“Not while I'm driving, Jare.” Evan told him. “When we get home, I'll shower you in all the love you want.” He promised, taking one hand off the wheel to grab Jared's. “Love you.”

“Love you too, dork.”


End file.
